A few weeks ago I accidentally "liked" someone's status on Facebook. It was an accident because I didn't realize it was one of those things where they give you a number & you share embarrassing facts about you with the world! This precious person gave me a TEN!
I never posted it on Facebook. I started trying to think of 10 things I could come up with, but everything sounded stupid to me. Then, I got embarrassed. I am a pretty open book. I usually wear my heart & emotions on my sleeve... or in my status bar. I couldn't share some of these things that I'd never even shared with my best friends.
But then it hit me.
There are parts of my life that I keep hidden because I don't want to deal with them. I share them with my husband, and that's about it! It's how I stay in control. It's how I don't become a mess in front of the whole world!
But if this pregnancy has taught me anything lately, it's that my feelings & internal stress are causing my BODY to react. So, even if my external self is in control, my muscles & immune system are usually going to take a hit.
When we had a family member speak rudely about our being pregnant, for the first time ever I told them how I REALLY felt. I wasn't unkind or ugly, but I was truthful & blunt. I've never done that before. It was amazing! I went to my chiropractor the next day & her comment was, "well whatever it was that came over you, it needed to come out!" My muscles were calm. My spine was in alignment. That's never happened.
I started this new thing this pregnancy where I'm really conscious about speaking my mind. Not in a rude way. I try not to cross a line & stir things up that don't need to be, however I don't bottle things up. Even if I just vent to my husband & we decide it's best that I don't share that with that person, it's better than just tucking that hurt, pain & unnecessary stress away for the next 10 years!
I have also learned that some parts of who I am are important, even if they're uncomfortable. They've made me into the person I am. So, I'm taking baby steps today. I'm sharing with my readers the 10 things I was too much of a baby to share on Facebook. The 10 things that probably aren't a big deal, but I've been dwelling on for the past few weeks. I can't wait to get them out!
10 things:
1. I didn't like babies before I had them. I figured I should. So my motto was "I want 1, I'll take 2 but only if they're twins so I can get em out in one shot". For real! Now, I teach childbirth education classes & am pregnant w my 6th child. Never underestimate the power of giving birth. It changed my life!
2. I knew I was going to marry Michael when I was 13. I felt like God had showed me, wrote it in my journal, but thought I was crazy for even thinking it! We started dating when I was 16 & got married when I was 19. He was my only boyfriend. I've never kissed anyone else. We are seriously soul mates!
3. I found out I was 16 weeks pregnant with Efton on my 19th birthday. It was traumatic to say the least. Birthdays have ALWAYS been a big deal to me, but even more now! That's why I celebrate big & surround myself with people I love. I need it on that day!
4. Masks terrify me. In particular burglar masks- like the ones that look like panty hose or ski masks.
5. I'm an extrovert, but only in comfortable places. I hate parties where I know no one, new places, and I really didn't like college for that reason. BUT put me in my element & I come alive. I'm the life of the party!
6. My favorite colors are & have been since 1st grade (in this particular order ): pink, teal, lime green, orange, purple. I do not like red. At all. Except for the Cardinals... ;)
7. Gum chomping drives me CRAZY! Someone in our wedding had gum in their mouth & it makes me mad to this very day! I skip their part coming down the aisle every year when we watch our wedding DVD.
8. I peed my pants in the outfield during a softball game. My coach was a terrible, mean woman who said if I had to go that was too bad. I was 9 & REALLY had to go! At a certain point there was no more holding it. I immediately left the field & never played softball again. LOL!
9. I have a really gross ability to belch. Like, manly belching.
10. I discovered about a year ago that I have a math "dyslexia" called Dyscalculia. While it was a really difficult thing to finally realize, it explained so much of the frustration I've had my whole life in school, problem solving situations, time concepts, our finances... So even though it was hard & I don't usually tell people about it (until now, lol), it was such a relief to know what was going on all this time!
Whew! That feels better!
Anyone else need to get something off their chest? Haha! Feel free...
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