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Friday, June 13, 2014

Easton's BIRTH

The day has finally come!

Well, at least for those of you as obsessed with birth stories as I am.


After weeks of squeezing in writing time between nursing and pumping and diapers... 
editing songs and pictures over and over at 1am until they are *perfect*...
then deleting and starting over because you need a clean slate...

FINALLY I have completed my birth story & slideshow. Easton's birth was not like my last. It was not like my first. In fact it was not like any of my other births.

(To see those birth stories click HERE, HERE, and HERE.) 

That is one of my favorite things about birthing and parenting. 
Each birth, each pregnancy, each child is different. 

I have SIX now. 
(cr@zy)

Among all six of my children, there may be a few similarities, 
but not a single experience is the same from child to child. 
They keep you on your toes!

My births have all been a little different, and this one is no exception. This little (actually my biggest) guy took a little longer, made me work a little harder, and in the end has taught me so much about birth... and life.

Hope you enjoy!
(stick around through Part 2 for the video)




Easton's BIRTH- Part 1


Easton’s Birth Story
Part 1

I was certain that I would go into labor at 39 weeks. Positively certain. So, after 38 weeks, 39 weeks, 40 weeks, and this blog post… I was still pregnant. 

I had taken maternity photos, done a belly cast, had henna painted, processed through all my previous births, and enjoyed every last moment of my pregnancy. My house had been cleaned, the bassinet was ready, and my birth kit was waiting in my bedroom. I was literally just waiting for baby!



After weeks of start & stop contractions and prodromal labor, I had our midwife strip my membranes at my 40-week appointment on Tuesday. My dad was leaving town early Thursday morning, and my midwife would be out of town over the upcoming weekend. I was feeling anxious, even though there was nothing I could do. If I didn’t have a baby soon, it was not going to go as planned. 

If you know me at all… you know I like everything to go as planned. 
Also, if you know me at all, you know that in my life 
nothing ever goes as I planned. 

So, I had to just trust that God had a plan for this birth, and that it would be the perfect timing for both baby & I.



I knew typically if stripping the membranes were going to start labor that would usually happen within 24-48 hours. So when nothing had happened by Thursday morning I was pretty convinced nothing was going to happen any time soon. I had been having contractions, but they would never pick up in intensity or get any closer. So, I called my mom to come over on Thursday morning to go walk with the kids & I somewhere. I figured I might as well help baby settle into the best position possible. As all birth educators and doulas know, walking is an excellent way to do that!


Another little glitch in my plan was that I had planned on having a friend photograph our birth. It was one of those “birth bucket list” things that was really important to me if this were to be our last. Well, Wednesday afternoon I saw on Facebook that our photographer had the flu. I couldn’t have a sick person come into my home when I’m giving birth! So, I called another photographer friend, Valerie. She & I had jokingly talked about having her as a backup in case I go so fast that the other photographer couldn’t make it. She said she would be good to go as my backup as long as I didn’t go into labor that day. 
“Cross your legs until 9pm” 
Those were her exact words to me. I was pretty sure that wouldn’t be a problem. I was convinced that this baby wasn’t coming anytime soon.


Michael was working from home that day. I had the kids pick up the house “just in case”. My mom came over, and we decided to go to the park. As I was getting ready, I just felt kind of crampy. The cramps weren’t coming in waves or regularly. I just felt weird. 

At the park we walked… and walked… and walked. I was having a few Braxton Hicks contractions, but nothing big. We went home to have lunch. That afternoon the contractions stopped all together. I knew they would. I was expecting them too! So, after the kids took naps, I had Michael come with the kids & I on a walk around our neighborhood. Things started up again. This time the cramping & Braxton Hicks seemed to be alternating. I was pretty sure it would still be a couple days, but again, “just in case”, I sent Michael & our oldest to their baseball game that evening while my mom came over to stay with me. We cleaned up a little and made sure the important areas of the house were ready. I was having a few more random contractions, but again nothing big or regular.

That night, after Michael had come home, my mom was playing checkers with the older kids after their baths. I went upstairs to put our 2 year old to bed. Around 8:30, as I nursed him (bucket list… nursing through pregnancy), inhaling my relaxing essential oils, I started having a couple stronger contractions. It was pretty normal for me to contract while nursing as it produces Oxytocin, which is the hormone that starts contractions. However, usually they would stop and never go anywhere. At 9:00 he was snoring on our bed, and I had another strong contraction. 

Valerie had said not until 9… 
our midwife was in town...
but my dad was in California. 
I tried not to think about that part.

Michael came in to check on us, and I told him I was having contractions. He had just sent my mom home. Everyone was in bed & I was, as usual, in denial.





At 11:00, I decided this could be something. I was having good, strong contractions, but they still weren’t in a very good pattern. They were about every 4-8 minutes and only 30-45 seconds long. During my last labor, the shower was really helpful for me to determine if labor was real or false. So, I thought perhaps that would help me determine if this was real labor or not. Into the shower I went… within moments, I was uncomfortable & the contractions were simply unbearable. Then, I thought maybe I should eat something & drink a bunch of water. These contractions seemed way more intense than usual for early labor.

By 11:30 I was 75% sure that this was the real thing. I had Michael make me eggs & I sent a text to our midwife, Jessica, as well as our doula/friend/birth assistant, Teresa. I let them know I was pretty sure I was in early labor still, but that the contractions were more intense than last time. Michael also sent my mom a text, which I’m so glad he did. Around 12 I began to have to stop talking and focus a little more on the rushes that were coming. My mom came around this time in case any of the kids woke up. Jessica called Miranda, her student midwife. Both of them, as well as Teresa, were heading my way. They knew how fast I usually go once I get into active labor, so we all felt most comfortable having them close by. At this point contractions were picking up to every 3-6 minutes.





Easton's BIRTH- Part 2


Easton's Birth 
PART 2

*if you haven't read part 1, CLICK HERE to read*



As we waited for everyone to arrive, I had Michael start to fill up the birth tub down in our family room. I hadn’t really planned on birthing in it, but I knew I wanted it as an option. I put on a little makeup and fixed my hair… this is how Michael knew. 

He always says he knows it’s real labor when I put my makeup on. 
It was the real deal. 

It was 12:30 and contractions were 3-5 minutes apart and building, but still feeling random. I sent Valerie a text to let her know.



I labored for a while as the tub filled. 

Just a bit of advice. 
Birth tubs make rooms humid. 
Humidity ruins pretty hair. 
Fixing your hair before you hang out in said room is a waste of time. 

Back to the birth…


By 1:30 Jessica, Miranda, and Teresa had arrived. The interesting thing about my contractions at this point was that they were coming consistently, but the intensity was weird. They would be strong, and then get lighter, then stronger, and then light again. I never knew quite what to expect.

I labored throughout the early morning hours with contractions still at every 3-5 minutes. Valerie arrived sometime. I was in labor land, so I have no idea what really happened. I remember talking & laughing between contractions. I also remember my mom mentioning the book she gave me when I first got pregnant with our oldest & how it made me sick to see the pictures of birthing. I got the book out to show everyone, which is really funny to me. It’s a great book that I have used in my birth classes actually! I just find it funny that I felt the need to have show & tell during my labor.


They look amused, don't they? Haha!

Anyway, I do know that around 3:30 I wanted to be in the water. I debated in my head whether it was time or not… & then after a contraction, I just knew. Within moments I was in that tub. I had now been up for a while & was getting really tired. 
The water was super relaxing. 
Now I know why mommas love their water births!

Contractions still felt inconsistent as far as intensity, but regardless, I began to feel pushy around 6:30. I had the thought that I wanted to have someone check me, but they had just shown my mom the “purple line” about an hour before that and it showed that I was really close. So, I figured I was probably fully dilated.

If you don't know what "the purple line" is... check this out. It's pretty amazing!



We woke up our oldest daughter so she didn’t miss anything & our 2 year old had started to wake up at this time too. It was almost time to meet our baby!

I pushed… and grunted… and growled… and pushed some more. I had never felt such strange contractions. They were spreading far apart, which can be normal to give your body some rest between. They didn’t feel as powerful as they should though. My water still hadn’t broken, but we thought we *maybe* saw it leaking. Perhaps that would help things intensify? Slowly, as I’m working through these weird contractions, our other kids began to wake up. I felt weak & tired. Almost like I could fall asleep between contractions. So, I rested, but assumed we were getting close. I knew it had been a longer active labor, but I was so tired at this point that I didn’t realize how long I had been pushing!



After an hour of pushing with no results, Jessica got a look on her face. I know that look. It’s the same one she got when she thought I was losing too much blood after our last birth (really it was just the placenta coming out right after baby). 

I can hear her voice now saying
 “I need you to show me that you can push this baby out on the next contraction”. 

So I tried, but the contraction was so weak! I couldn’t get enough power behind it to feel like I was doing anything! She then said I needed to get out of the water. I didn't hesitate. This was about 7:30 am.



I got right out of the water & lay on the couch where she was going to check me. Sure enough, there was a lip of my cervix that wasn’t dilated & my water still hadn’t broken. It was bulging and firm. Baby would not be able to descend until we got past that lip. As I waited, trying not to push, for 2-3 contractions, Jessica slowly stretched that lip of my cervix. As soon as she was finished, my bag of waters ruptured on the next contraction. 
It was such a relief. 

However, she then needed me to try not to push through a few more contractions, so that my cervix could slowly stretch & baby could descend. We decided it would be best if I stood, allowing gravity to help. Well, it sure did. As soon as I stood up, baby descended and I felt those strong, uncontrollable contractions that I should have felt an hour before that!

As soon as baby dropped down, I felt lots of pressure. Amniotic fluid poured out all over Michael & I. Then the next thing I knew, baby was pushing on my bladder so strongly that I peed right there in my family room on the floor… on my husband’s feet. Haha! I couldn’t help it! At this point, I couldn’t even stand any longer. Michael was holding me up completely. I just remember I kept saying “I’m sorry- I have to push. I can’t wait. I’m so sorry!” I was trying to follow my instructions, but I couldn’t stop the urge to push.



There are 2 words that come to mind when I think of the next moments… 
intense & violent. 



I would have never used the word violent to describe such a beautiful moment as birth, but as my legs began to shake and I felt my baby coming out with such force, no better word comes to mind! Within moments I was scared, nervous, weak, emotional, and ready to get this baby out. I squeezed Michael’s arm, hearing everyone tell me how good I was doing and how I should give one more good push. 
I just cried,

“I can’t!" 

I had made it all along being such a good birther. 
I had moaned. I had breathed. 
I had done everything I was supposed to do, 
but in that moment I just couldn’t take any more! 
My cries were met with instant replies from my husband and amazing birth team. 

“Yes, you can!”

So, I pushed through the most extreme, burning, fiery pain I’ve ever felt. I had never had a birth like this. I had never known such weakness & yet strength in my body all at the same time. I gave one last growl & felt the head, followed by 2 shoulders, and then body & legs come out. I knew what each part was as my baby literally was ejected from my body. As I fought through, I felt so much emotion. I felt so much love. This baby that I had been waiting for was finally here!

At 8:02 am, as my husband held me, and my children waited on the steps watching with my mom, I heard someone say “Kourtney reach down & grab your baby”. As I pulled this little one up to my chest, I practically fell onto the nearby couch. I couldn’t stand, but my heart was so full at that instant that I didn’t even notice how weak I was. Michael & I just held our baby and cried. We didn’t care if it was a boy or a girl. We didn’t care how long it had taken. We had conquered this amazing, beautiful thing during this birth & for that brief moment time seemed to stand still. We looked at every finger and toe. We stroked that sweet, soft skin. I just held my baby & breathed in deeply, taking in every last bit of that amazing newborn smell.

After those precious minutes had passed I looked over to Michael & said “are you ready to find out?” Jessica & Miranda had already snuck a peek, but since they’re awesome they didn’t say anything. 

I should also mention that most everyone thought we were having a girl. Our boy-girl pattern had become pretty predictable. My mom & I, however, had been thinking it could be a boy, since I felt like it was a bigger baby. My boys are usually longer & weigh more.
 So, back to the story…



We hesitated for a split second. I made sure the kids were all watching. Then, Michael pulled open the skinniest, longest baby legs I’ve ever seen to find out… 

IT’S A BOY! 

We looked over to find our boys with the BIGGEST smiles on their faces. Our oldest daughter said, “I guess God thought we needed another sweet boy.” 
*sigh*
Precious. Just precious.


There are many more details that I could ramble on about... 

I could tell you about how wonderful it was to walk up to my bedroom 
and change into dry clothes. 
I could tell you about how hungry I was or how sore I was the next day- 
like I’d been in a car accident or something. 
My entire body ached from those last 45 minutes of fierce labor! 

However, I don’t need to go into all that.


All you need to know is the “sometimes”. 
Sometimes things don’t go how we have planned. Sometimes it’s hard and we really have to work for what is important to us. Sometimes we not only have to work, but we have to fight. Sometimes, when it’s all said and done, you discover something you never knew. 
You uncover a warrior inside of you. 
I had never realized what I was truly capable of, and yet how much I needed everyone around me to get to that place.


That isn’t the end of the story. We still had a long postpartum road to walk through. 
But for that brief moment, I had a glimpse of perfection. 
An absolutely perfect, 8 pound 8 ounce, 21 ½ inch long baby boy who made those hours of labor completely worth it. Someday I might not remember all these details, but I will always remember who I became that day. That’s the unseen beauty of giving birth. 

No matter how many times you do it, 
a baby is not the only one who is born. 


And now...

EASTON'S HOMEBIRTH